Mother Nature & Anger Management

Mother Nature blowing off steam!
Image: paulmaszlik.deviantART.com

Mother Nature. You give life to all the beauties in the world. You're the prime nurturer of nature, so how could you be so cruel? What goes through your mind when you wake up and decide today will be a disaster? I know I encourage deep breathing often, but winds at 150 miles are not the full exhalation I'm referring to. May be you're just pissed off at the human race for slowly destroying everything you've created? Whatever your reason for Katrina, Andrew, or Sandy, you have deep rooted anger issues. AH-HA moment! OMG I can relate to Mother Nature!
Sometimes, my day starts with happy feet and a bright smile. No one can put a damper on my day AND then it happens! My boss tells me my marketing pitch is lack lustre, or I missed a major deadline, or I burned dinner! Suddenly the dark side awakens and I go from simmer to boiling in seconds. My heart rate goes up, my cheeks turn red, and my breath shortens - I'm a moving volcano. So when I questioned Mother Nature's emotional dysfunction, it dawned on me that we're just like her. We all have sunny days with light wind, and we most certainly have days with downpours of hail and sharp winds.
As we watch CNN in bewilderment, let's step back a minute to acknowledge our own anger that lives deep within us. Yesterday, Sandy was having a horrible day and she was sure to let it all out. But what if Sandy released her anger in increments instead? Perhaps one day she'd blow strong winds in the desert and another day she'd strike lightning in the plains. No one would get hurt and she'd release her anger; it's a win-win! That being said, how can we release anger before it gets too intense and explosive?
Luckily, there are props we can use to fuel our anger. Punching bags rock! Don't have one? Pound your pillow instead. The physical contact of a fist to a pillow or baseball bat to a tree, sends vibrations in your body which actually relieve tension. Stress and anger can produce significant physical and emotional discomfort. Often times, like Mother Nature, we discharge our anger onto other people. If you release feelings of intense anger regularly (through use of props, not people), it'll have a cathartic effect on your overall stress or anger level.
The way in which we wish Mother Nature could ease up and calm down, I wish the same for all of us as well. Let's give inner peace a chance!

I'm an Entrepreneur

When I stopped having butterflies over Yves St. Laurent newsletters, I knew it was time to move on. Fashion continues to run deep in my veins, but as of last Fall, it just wasn't getting my heart rate up anymore. The only thing that managed to crank up my heart rate back then, was my anxiety. While I battled to get back to happy, I started connecting to my Self through various unconventional methods. It took a lot of deep breathing exercises, meditation, yoga, and positive self-talk through affirmations, to help me get through it.

One day, as I lay my head on my pillow, with tears streaming down, I struggled to think of positive affirmations to get me out of this miserable state. I had a breakthrough! Why not print affirmations on the one place I rely on for mental peace? My pillow has been my best friend throughout every anxiety attack. I'm beyond grateful to the goose that provided its feathers for my little head, loaded with racing thoughts, to find peace every night. I needed to refer to books, articles I had collected, and cards to reassure me that all was well in my world. All I wanted was a dependable bedside buddy to redirect my thoughts from bad to good. And with my pillow being so comforting, designing a pillowcase with key affirmations to start and end my day, was the best idea I ever manifested.

My small business is called OMANTRA (OM - being the Universal sound and Mantra being words that you repeat to achieve mental bliss). I designed a set of 'AM' and 'PM' pillowcases. The 'AM' pillowcase says 'INHALE' on the front, and holds seven morning affirmations to start your day feeling empowered with self-love. The 'PM' pillowcase says 'EXHALE' on the front, with seven evening affirmations to end a busy, stressful day in peace. I created this product because I truly believe in the power of our thoughts and how deeply they are connected to the Universe. "Change your thoughts; change your life" is a motto I strongly support as our thoughts dictate how our lives will unfold, minute by minute.

As you lay your head on your pillow tonight, I encourage you think of only the BEST moments of your day, and let go of the less memorable ones that don't serve you any good. Thank your pillow for the comfort it provides your body, mind, and spirit. To the insomniacs, a pillowcase to repeat positive affirmations could serve you more than a good night's sleep ;) Happy thoughts!

 

We're all Bullies @ some Point

Image: Amanda Todd Facebook memorial pg

On October 10th, 2012 yet another teen took her own life due to bullying. I won't bore you with bullying stats, but the stat I will highlight is that of Amanda Todd's Facebook memorial page, which has 748,770 likes! It makes you wonder: did this young girl, who felt completely alone, who dared to pour out her pain on a youtube video, ever imagine she'd be liked by more than half a million people?
Bullying (the hot topic for over a decade) is an epidemic that seems uncontrollable. But as a mother of two, I refuse to believe that it can't be stopped. For a while, I dismissed bullying stories because I felt the media was simply glamorizing these acts of hate. I also wondered what role the parents of these victims were playing. How were they supporting their child emotionally? Did they verbally brainwash their children into believing they were inferior, therefore lacking in self-esteem? Where was the deep rooted, unconditional love only a parent can provide? I'm sure there are endless answers to these questions, but the tough questions go to the parents of the bullies. Where is the love? There's absolutely no way you can convince me that a child raised with raw love, can ever hurt someone so badly, that they'd encourage them to commit suicide.
But I can clearly see how bullying has changed since I was a child. In elementary school, having nicknames for our peers was a tradition. Though these nicknames certainly weren't kind, that was about the extent of bullying that I can recall. Today bullying goes way beyond the school yard and doesn't end at 3 pm. Thanks to our high-tech world, bullying takes on a whole new life in cyberspace. Our children today live under a microscope with little room for pity. Verbal torture is the hottest trend on Facebook - so now what? Well I'm so done with hearing yet another suicide stat under the bullying category. I thought I'd write a post that could perhaps enlighten just one little soul or awaken one parent.
Kindness is simple. Love is what completes us. Communication is the essential tool to connect kindness with love. Talk to your children with an open heart and express the responsibility they have to be kind human beings. But in order for our children to buy into our lecture, WE, the adults, have to show kindness and love towards others as well. If you sit on the phone criticising your "friend", and your children hear that, what message are you sending? If you then attempt to discuss the harmful affects bullying has on others, you're most likely going to get tuned out. Bullying isn't only a child/teen crisis, it's actually very common among adults as well. Judgement, criticism, belittlement are all recognizable, unloving actions, that we're all guilty of doing. If each day, you commit to replacing a critical comment with a compassionate one, you're now part of the solution. Inhale the love, exhale the hostility.
In the end (as always) only kindness matters. Show kindness towards yourself, those you love, and to the ones you love a little less - bring it on! When you see someone who hurt you and have the power to wish them well - that's character. Make your mission to be so busy loving your life, you have no time for hate or regret. Share that mission at your dinner table or with your students. You're never too young or too old to manifest random acts of kindness. We're all responsible for our actions, so why not make them positive ones? Want to end bullying? Start by sharing love, compassion, and kindness because those actions can never destroy any human being's spirit.
To Amanda Todd, and all the other silent heroes who drowned in hatred; your legacy will live on forever. Through your deep suffering, you helped others defeat their demons. It takes true character to be a warrior and these fallen angels make up the warriorship. RIP.

The Butterfly Effect

Parsva Bakasana/Side Crane pose

This year I transitioned from a caterpillar into a butterfly. Caterpillars almost "melt" completely before turning into butterflies. Well a little over a year ago, I can candidly admit that I was having my own meltdown! I was now a mother of two (equals double dependency on Mommy), with a rising career on hold. Creating my family ranked high on my 'to do' list, but it was also overwhelming. I went from European business trips and private plane rides across the US, to visiting pediatricians for ear infection diagnostics. Following seasonal trends in Vogue was replaced by Babycenter.com for insight on developmental milestones. As my children were growing, I was slowly melting. I couldn't comprehend how I went from three quarters up the corporate ladder, to strategizing self-soothing sleep methods. The pressure of having two children depend on me, was beyond that of finding the perfect model for our Fall campaign. Though both duties offered little room for error, I set the Mom bar so high, it was unreachable. Slowly, slowly I melted down, feeling lost and disoriented. I comforted myself with tears and pity parties. How did I get here? When will I leave? Will I ever be good enough at this?

Over a year later, I can proclaim, I made it! I got through each stage with struggle and motivation. I was determined to be me again. I still have to remind myself daily that I am good enough, and to breathe, breathe, and breathe some more. So on this Thanksgiving weekend, I felt it necessary to share my gratitude. To my husband and close friends, who didn't understand, but listened nonetheless - I thank you. To God, the Source, who cheered me on spiritually - I thank you. To Team Uni-verse for consistently supporting me through mudslides and waterfalls - I thank you. Parsva Bakasana (see image) would never be achievable if I didn't trust you! To my dear yoga mat for holding up the mirror to my fears - I bow to you! Lastly, to every caterpillar that's "melting" - be kind to your Self, give your worries to the Uni-verse and remember to breathe, breathe, and breathe some more!