Dying to Win

We need shade to appreciate the light



You woke up this morning. Check. You walked over to pour yourself a cup of coffee. Check. You're not terminally ill. Check with fireworks. It's going to be a damn good day! If for one minute today you're feeling stuck, depleted, low-spirited or simply negative - Stop. Breathe. Surrender to whatever the universe is firing your way. Nothing really bad or really good ever lasts that long anyway.
With pink ribbons overpowering Halloween decorations, it's pretty clear that cancer has gone from awareness to commonness. This post is for the cheerleaders on the sidelines, supporting anyone fighting an illness. It's also for those who are spectators in the bleachers. Wherever you're standing, you're familiar with the rules. Cancer or any terminal illness is like watching the Super Bowl - you know someone is gonna lose, but you don't know when. Ah the 'when' period is dreadfully painful.
From my experience on the sidelines, I credit yoga for helping me accept the process of life. I sat bedside for weeks helping my grandmother transition into her next phase of life. I'm not going to lie - the little girl in me didn't want to let go. I did a whole lot of breathing. I'd breathe into that pain so that when she'd look at me, she knew she could surrender to the inevitable.
And you? How are you effected by pink ribbons and cancer fundraisers? If you weren't equipped to accept your loss, it's not too late. The universe gives you plenty of second chances. You watched a rookie get intercepted by an overwhelming force, famous for touchdowns. You hoped, you prayed, you wished the odds were better. May be you regret not being present enough. There's a reason you stayed away from the sidelines and that's OK. Cheerleading isn't for everyone. Make peace with yourself by surrendering to what you cannot control.
For all of us who know someone presently ill, I encourage you to follow the rules and cry. Crying is a normal reaction that gets you bonus points. Waiting for the 'when' sucks, but it's an opportunity to recognize how blessed you are to have this person in your life. With a heavy heart, I smile at all those I've lost to cancer, and I pull out my pom poms to the ones on the field.
If you're complaining today. Stop. Breathe. Remind yourself you're healthy, and keep growing.

I Heart Nothingness

I'm feeling very mellow today. The dust has settled after a wild, long week-end high. It feels so good to reflect on my day only to realize that all I've done so far is eat and yoga. On the heels of Thanksgiving, I'm beyond grateful for being able to bask in nothingness. For years I worked tirelessly, feeling consumed by jetlagged business trips, stuffy fashion events, and a boss who never accepted "impossible" as an answer. Back then I was proud to look at my calendar in wonderment of when I'd be able to schedule a pee break. I was busy, busy, busy. Busy equalled performance; performance brought results; results delivered achievement ; achievement equalled value*. Today, my evaluation looks a lil more like this: busy equals doing; doing distracts from being; not being causes imbalance; imbalance creates instability; instability awakens truth. This means that we'd rather be busy with distractions than taking time for ourselves. And when we silence our accumulated 'stuff', we're just suppressing our truth.
It only takes 5 minutes to re-set your mind and relax your body. Sitting, and just breathing can settle anxiety, insomnia, fear. Breathing alone can reduce tension in your body. We're part of a culture that needs a list of credentials, full inbox, 500+ Facebook friends, a LinkedIn profile, Twitter account, gym membership, and a sold out Saturday night schedule to feel valued. Whatever happened to glorifying the luxury of doing nothing, yet being more? Dictionary.com defines 'nothingness' as follows: noth·ing·ness
1. the state of being nothing.

2. something that is nonexistent: a view of humanity as suspended between infinity and nothingness. 

3. lack of being; nonexistence

4. unconsciousness or death

5. utter insignificance, emptiness, or worthlessness; triviality

WOW!  "Nonexistent"? "Insignificant"? "Worthlessness"? I think this definition needs a 2013 update! You heard it here first - Nothingness is the healthiest pastime. When I ask someone what they're doing and they reply "nothing", I'm actually impressed. According to my husband (reality checkmate), doing nothing doesn't pay Hydro. Granted it doesn't pay the bills, however I'm not saying to do nothing all day, every day. I'm suggesting that you do less and be more. Sit with yourself more often. Stop, breath, listen. Feel the four corners of your feet touch the earth. Inhale the crisp October air. Listen to the rustling of the leaves. Watch the beauty of their changing color. Just take 5 minutes a day to tune in and connect to the rawness of life. You'll slow down, become kinder, a little more patient, and tolerant with yourself and everything around you.

Namaste.

*Don't let someone else estimate your value. Find your own value through the simplicities of just being.